Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Am i wrong to feel my husband is wrong?

We've been together for 15years and been married for nearly 12years have 2 boys 11years and 6years. At beginning he was the man i wanted we did everything together, but when the first was born things changed and he started going out to pubs and clubs with friends and i had to stay at home with son. then after 3year he stopped and everything was perfect, but for the last 4years he goes out often and come home early morning hours. once in a while he will take me with or phone me to join him cause we've got domestic that sleeps in. but when i want to drink a glass of wine or if i do so cause sitting alone at home and only 33 he's got a problem. he tells me that i have drinking problem, not allowed to have a glass of wine when making supper and if i have a glass over the weekend and he's at home he has big problem with it. but there is nothing wrong if he goes to a pub in week at 4pm with friends drinking and come home 8pm or so. when i go with him to club or friends he always want to go home early but when he's alone it's morning hours and then i get accused of being a slut and drunk and being very rude that the people tells him what asshole he is. we seldom have a braai or evening at home as family and have a drink and just have a nice time together after kids went to bed. like tonight we were invited to a housewarming and we got dvd and decided not to go after bathed and in pajamas his friends call at 11pm and say we must come. so because of youngest that does not like us to go i said i will stay and after he promised me a day ago he will stop doing it and sorry of telling me i am a slut and alcoholic and from now we going to do things together he still went got dressed and went after 2hours have not phoned or sms me or say he want to come fetch me cause could see before he went youngest was nearly asleep and knows not like when we go out so he could have waited 15min cause that was how long it was until he fell asleep. but now it's fine for him to drink with his friend but when i visit my parents like today he calls all the time and same if i go shopping or visit friends and then also not allowed to have a drink with them and also not allowed to visit this one or that one. And say tomorrow that's saturday and i want to buy a bottle of wine i have a drinking problem or i say let's get something to drink he does not want to drink. So am i wrong if i buy a bottle of wine and don't tell him and to feel so unhappy, cause why must i be the one to always consider the fact that we've got children and he just does as he wants. I can't see anything wrong to wait till they sleep and then go somewhere or just chill at home together. but when he's with me he drinks cooldrink or coffee and i must do the same.

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